Saturday, May 29, 2010

An Algerian relationship

An Algerian relationship.
The idea of writing this article came to my mind when I went for shopping with my mother where I observed some couples walking in the street.
I have celebrated recently my twenty second birthday and I till now, I have never been in a date with any Algerian boy. However, my interests concerning the Algerian way of dating, having a girl friend, or just hooking up are quite high and thirsty.
I do believe that I have a weird way of loving and this difference makes it hard for me to be with someone here in Algeria. My only boy friend was a foreigner and the way of dating him was absolutely different from what I see in the Algerian streets.
I base my choices and decisions on personal convictions that very few Algerians would understand, and the ones who do, are good friends of mine.

I am sure that most of girls don’t share my humble opinion and I don’t blame them for that since I find it hard also to understand how can they date this way?
Algerian dates are based on money; food, and frustration, three miserable reasons that make me stay on the safe side, till I leave this country.
I was walking with my mother today and at a certain time we decided to stop for lunch. It was absolutely impossible to find a restaurant where most of people aren’t couples.
When you date someone, the only place he can take you to, is a fast food (if he is jobless) and a restaurant (if he has some more dinars in his pockets).
I am not against the idea of doing it when it is followed by other kinds of activities that can make you know better the guy/ the girl you are with… When all your dates have the same plan and the same logic, they get quite boring.. I started even to believe that dating for Algerians means feeding a hungry girl.

If it isn’t to restaurants, then to gardens that you are taken. Of course, the Algerian gardens have no relationship with the Victoria towers ones. Actually, its quality isn’t my main worry. I should think more about what the Algerian law calls: affective demonstration in public, which- open well your ears- concerns even taking your girl friend hand.
I bet, José, while reading this article will remember the day we nearly ended up in prison because he put his hand on my shoulder in public. I knew at that time why are all Algerians frustrated with sex.

So in order to avoid this quite embarrassing and terrifying situation with the police, couples prefer to hide and for this, they chose hostels which are established in various small and dirty streets of the capital.
Algeria, more than being a Muslim country, is a closed one because of its traditions and customs.

I met few people who had the opportunity to know what sexual education means. It just explains why most of my friends make me shut up when in a public debate I use the word “sex”.
The sexual frustration of people around me surprises me a lot. It is hard to date someone who doesn’t think of leading to a sexual practice, and that’s what those small hostels are made for.

I do admit that sex is part of any relationship because by definition: a boy friend is a friend who attracts you, and this last one is based on desire.
Most of my friends take big pleasure in calling me:”incompetent lover” because they find it hard to believe that I could date and stay a virgin kisser at the same time.
To rule the world, we really need to make work the strongest parts of the body and sex is just part of the human being weakness.

Money in Algeria brings love. You would be dated if you have a nice car, a credit card and if your swatch is a true one.
Control is an aspect of the Algerian date also. At a certain time of the relationship, you start wondering if what you have is a boy friend or a husband, something that drives me completely mad.
I do believe in the individuality of each human being and his total freedom to act the way he wants without having anyone on his back asking him to stop doing this, to avoid meeting that one, to change the way of clothing or to obey to what doesn’t suit the personal choices that make a human being feel happy in his element.

I still have one more year to spend here in Algeria, I am sure I will learn more and discover more astonishing things that I will share with all of you within my pure analyze but I still doubt that my heart can beat someday inside this high level of insanity, dissatisfaction and lack of trust and understanding where people judge you as they want to.

Thank you.

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