Wednesday, January 14, 2009


It was 15h, I had just finished the course of nutrition.
Put my brown jacket, my glasses, and the music at its top on the headphone of my mobile and started walking.

The songs I listened to were the same two ones: because of you, and, A thousand miles.
I felt that today was going to be another strange day.
I was walking, and Thinking. People was passing, my mind went in some deep feelings with the music and the faces coming in front of me, couldn’t know to what I was looking, as I was wearing my glasses.

At this time, I remembered a worry that I am having since few weeks.
I asked myself, how do I do to be convinced and confident about something and how is it possible to feel in total doubt about others?

I give some examples to explain it in a better way:

I am convinced that I am made to be a restaurant manager, even though I have tried to study different modules at university.
I am convinced that I’ll keep my hair with light black, even though I saw all the possible colors that suit me more.

I am also convinced that if numbers were human beings, then the number 1 would be a man, and 2 a woman.

I realized that to get to a conviction, I need a lot of time, but once made, I can’t have, not a single doubt about them.
This reminds me the last event happening to me with one of my friends, explaining me that friendship can’t come to a love story.

At his words, I laughed a lot, because it is not his argument which would fix my ideas. What he had said , is a conviction in my mind followed by my whole body: I note here: soul, heart, thoughts, feelings…
So back to my doubts, I find it crazy that I still can’t come to a decision about my studies of next year.

My last course in management was about “decisions”. Actually, the bases given by the teacher were really meaningful.
Analyzing the problem, studying all the possible solutions and choosing the one with the most benefits_ between brackets _ with the less disadvantages.
As long as I’ve tried to come to a decision using this method, I found myself in a vicious circle with no possible end.

Still that, at the end of this, I have kind of serious questions:

Why do we doubt?
Is it because of our feelings, our minds, the faced situation, or the fears of the results?
How is it possible to doubt about something and to be convinced of another- in the case- where no proof is used to help us making up our minds?

Is doubt a sort feeling?
I guess, yes; because it affects our hearts and changes our mood.
Again. I think that this subject is typically a part of us ‘human beings’
So till I come to a final decision, I thank all of you for reading

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